A Letter

Hi, I'm pretty sure you're already got fucked up tonight, knowing I bathed myself up after 6. I'm sorry for making a new one, but this one's a bit different.

I've written you a letter before, which I typed on my memopad on my phone. I've sent it to you, I felt okay before but then after another moment, I'd like to write some more. I'm longing to write everything about you, and on my previous letter, it's just... that's just incomplete. I feel it's some kind of an unfinished one. Look, you've been incredibly caring and kind, and sweet, but I feel like there's still something that I can't explain. All the thankyous I've written on my letter to you back then aren't worthy without actually telling you what exactly I'm thanking you for. You're right, I only wrote the things you've done, not the person you've been. But for some reasons, you're a great kid.. But on the other side, I'm feeling you have to grow up more a little and see the real world. I'm not like, being a realist all of the sudden, but in this case, you do. I might have gone away too far from the typical mind set kids around your age, but they're too hilariously.. unreal. I know this will be nonsense, but what else can I choose? What kind of things will you expect me to do? Aside from those unreal thoughts of yours, you're special, kid. As I said before, you're special, just the way you are. I'll miss your childish behaviors when you realize what exactly you're doing and change your ways and thoughts, when you've grown up later on. I'm not actually feeling you can remember all I've said to you on my letters, but I hope you'll remember me as a friend who writes when she couldn't think of anything else to do or choose. Remember me as someone who has given you tough moments, though I know you've been hating them so much ever since we're together. 

Your heart may long to a newer love, someone who's even more lovable, and nicer, and kinder, and so many things more. But, I have a strong feeling that you should save some of these words that'll (maybe) convince you someday, that you are special when you think you're not. Many people could come up with a word or two about you, but they only judge you from the outside, not from the inside. I may only have known you for a couple short times, but what you've been up to these days, they turned out to be something good. I don't even know (yet) whether you're a jerk or not, but I'm hoping you're not one of them, although what they always say is.. "Boys will be boys". But if you want to be different, you'll get onto your nerve to finally say that you're not one of them. Playing with others' feelings is not a good game to play, kid. But I gotta admit, you got good taste on choosing words that could melt a girl's feeling. You got me. But only a few, I got even a lot more! Hahaha!

Though we haven't seen each other for a very long time, can we ever meet up sometime? I'm desperately wanting to know how tall you are now.. Though I must have always been shorter than you. And the last but intentionally important is that... You have got to be even more patient, either for the relationship stuff, or your own business. Think twice before you act, think before you do stuff. And don't do things like I did, I mean, don't make any decisions when you're mad, or when you're angry. Well, simply don't do any of those decidings when you can't think straight. And you have got to be even more mature to deal with your problems, think like a thousand times before you do the real act. Cause once you got messed up, it'll be hard for you to fix, and those regrets will overwhelm you..like hell.

It's almost midnight huh? I don't care. What if I'm not writing this one for you? Maybe I'll never be able to give some of these new lectures to you. Hahah you must've said "Screw this person, I want to watch WC instead of reading this." but anyway, thanks for being super nice all along, I hate how you turned out to be so much different, I'm not getting it really, who are you transforming into? It's not cool, seriously. Just.. get back to the person you used to be, cause I like you just the way you are! :)